I’m back! And it feels really good to be here. I’ve taken 5 and a half months off but that doesn’t mean I haven’t been keeping an eye on these lovely pages. Motherhood is hard and early Motherhood is exhausting! But popping over to these pages everyday has given me a little bit of respite, I’ve enjoyed the odd little purchase here and there and loved reading about Fatherhood from Lolly’s husband Ste, Charlotte’s struggles with not always ‘getting it right’ and hearing from Fern about when she might feel broody again… If ever, to name a few. And the introduction of The Littles List and The Rock My Wedding book launches today. Amazing.
So anyway, I thought the best place to start would be to share Tayo’s birth story (thanks for all of your well wishes btw you lovely people). It’s a hard one to fit into one post so I thought I’d make it a two parter and hopefully I won’t bore the hell out of you. Today I’m going to talk about the lead up to labour and in the second part I’ll discuss the labour itself and what happened post labour.
If you read my last post before I went on maternity leave you will know that my waters ruptured at 30 weeks. What followed was a lot of talk of premature labour, walks around the NICU, twice weekly visits to the hospital for monitoring and then finally at 34 weeks I was admitted to hospital following a growth scan where they confirmed that Tayo was lying transverse, or sideways, and that mixed with my leaking waters was just too risky. I wouldn’t be returning home until I had a new baby in my arms.
They wanted to induce me at 36 weeks and not a day later. That meant almost two weeks stuck in a hospital bed whilst my husband tried to juggle life outside without me, which is no easy feat when he works over an hour from home, Leo only goes to nursery three days a week, we have no support network around us except for each other and well, I was in hospital to add to all the things he had to now think about. I’d packed a hospital bag but not one to last two weeks so he had to try and navigate my drawers too! Poor man. And more to the point, I wouldn’t be with my boy. For two weeks. I was devastated but I knew it was the best place for me to be. Keeping up with work coupled with multiple trips to the Costa in the main hospital building and making sure I kept my curtains open so I could talk to the other ladies on my ward just about kept me sane. And although we don’t have any friends or family close by I am unbelievably lucky to have incredible friends who popped up one Sunday afternoon to surprise me with a baby shower… That we held in the hospital car park! It made my life. And my beautiful boy came to visit me every day after nursery… Mainly to eat my rice pudding but just seeing his face for an hour was so wonderful.
When you spend a significant amount of time in a hospital bed you watch a lot. You observe. You overhear conversations. You see what our wonderful midwives have to go through on a daily basis. You see that she should’ve had her break by now but actually she’s here taking my blood pressure because she’s over run and wants to make sure that my obs are done on time because I am actually really important to her and my baby even more so. I just can’t praise them enough. They remembered me every day, they helped me through and they we’re genuinely interested in my well being. Absolute angels.
It was decided that my induction date would be Monday 16th August. A Monday!? It couldn’t be a Monday. My mom was in America, my in laws work, I’d not yet made any friends that could watch Leo for me should I need someone to be on hand. What if I was in labour and Anthony had gone to collect Leo?! Super stressed.
The following day the consultant did his rounds. He was SO lovely. He’d let me out for three hours at the weekend to get some fresh air, see my boy and if I’m honest…. go to the pub for a decent meal. So when he opened my curtains he was his happy chirpy self and I just cried in his face. Poor bloke. Anyway I told him my fears and how if it could happen on a Friday that would be so much better for me. To my surprise he was like… ‘ok, let’s do it Friday’. That was 3 days time.
For a week before his induction date Tayo was doing somersaults and hadn’t engaged even slightly and was still for the most part in a transverse lie. There was talk of having to physically turn him which was something I wasn’t at all looking forward to but low and behold, the morning of induction day, he was finally head down.
I was taken to the delivery suite and given two tablets and left for 6 hours. If nothing happened in 6 hours I could have another. Leo was at home with his Nana so I felt completely happy about him and now I could focus on trying to get this little boy here safely. It was some time in the afternoon when I had the tablets. I didn’t feel anything for a few hours. A couple of twinges but nothing that I would say was particularly significant. We ordered a chinese, watched some crap TV and laughed.
After about 5 hours my midwife came to examine me and confirmed I was 1 cm. I had a small contraction whilst I was being examined and that helped her to confirm that actually, whilst still head down (phew) Tayo still wasn’t engaged. She went back to report to the doctor and so I assumed I would have a good few hours before anything else happened.
Oh how wrong I was.
In swans the Doctor. She had her face mask on so all I could really see were her eyes. She could give any good Mac Make-Up counter girl a run for her money. Her eye shadow was amazing, her eyes such a dark brown. It might sound weird that I was so transfixed by her eyes but it was all I could see of her, I had to use them to connect with her. She examined me and told me that actually, she was going to fully break my waters, using that 1 cm gap. I really had no idea what it meant to be honest but I was like, Ok, let’s go.
She told me to inhale the gas and air. On my first breath I instantly felt sick. The Doctor told me that I needed to use it because this was going to hurt. How very right she was. I screamed. I didn’t want to scream but I did. If this is what it felt like to have your waters broken what was the birth going to be like?! Instant doubt entered my mind. There’s no way I could do this. She stopped immediately. Tears blurred my vision but she got me; she stared dead into my eyes. She told me ‘Becky I’m going to stop. And I’m not going to start again until you tell me to. This is your body. You are in charge.’ And from that moment everything seemed different. It was my body and I could do this. I just had to take a breath and gain some control. So I gave her the go ahead. I sucked with all my might on that gas and air. She broke my waters and at the same time, she engaged Tayo. Taking me from 1 cm to 3. And those waters that had been slowly dripping for the last 6 weeks? Well, turns out I still had an ocean left, so much so the poor doctor had to get changed because she was absolutely drenched.
Everything was seemingly quite calm except for the odd few small contractions. And then my Mom called from America.
If you have a story about being induced that you would like to share with us, please send us a submission, we’d love to hear from you.
Loved reading this, can’t wait for part 2.
I was admitted to hospital for three days due to high blood pressure when pregnant (my son is now 12 days old) and I am in total agreement that our midwives are amazing, they do such a wonderful job. God bless the NHS!
Great to have you back Becky. X
Ah congratulations! Aren’t they just. Absolute super stars x
Great to you have you back, can’t wait for the next part!
Thanks Kat x
Gawd you can’t leave it there!!!! Talk about cliffhanger…
Just keeping you on your toes aren’t I?! ?
Cliffhanger lols! Becky you’ve given us the birth equivalent of Dallas ?❤?xx
Pahahaaaa! Karen! I love a good cowboy hat. ?
BRILLIANT welcome back post ?
Can’t wait for part two. X
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Please say that part two will be tomorrow?? Thank you for sharing, I don’t know how you coped with worries about Tayo, missing Leon and being stuck in hospital all at once.
Haha Pips! Do you think you can wait a week?! It was such a rollercoaster of emotions but I think somehow we’re just designed to cope? I felt comfortable knowing that Tayo was being SO closely monitored and I just had to remind myself that although I wasn’t there, leos routine remained the same. That meant his life wasn’t really disrupted? So for him he probably barely noticed I wasn’t around. These little ones are so resilient and we were really open and honest with him which was probably a lot for a 3 year old to take on board but they don’t miss a trick so we felt that was the best approach x
Leon?? FFS autocorrect. Sorry!
You’re definitely right about resilience, it’s amazing how much they can take in their stride.
Welcome back Becky! Loved reading this and looking forward to part two!
Hi Kate! So good to be back x
Welcome back! Loved reading this first part of your story. That must have been incredibly tough for you and your family being in hospital for that time. I have to agree our NHS and it’s midwives is an absolute marvel. I’m looking forward to the next part xx
Thanks Sophie x
Right. I’m crying with you. Brilliant writing
Ah Liz! Hoping you might laugh (maybe as well as cry) at part 2! X
Yay, welcome back lovely Becky! Love everything about this and it brings back so many memories of my own induced labour. Can’t wait for part two next week. Big welcome back hugs xxx
Talk about a duff duff cliffhanger moment! Then what????
Midwifes really are amazing.
They really are Steph! Well, Mom called and then… ?
Oh girl it’s SO GOOD to have you back! It was only when I reached the end that I realised I hadn’t breathed out for the entire time it took me to read… and that my legs were tightly crossed!
Looking forward to part 2 ??xxx
My legs were also tightly crossed… as you will read in part 2! ?
This is one of the occasions where I feel VERY lucky to have swerved the horrors of labour! ??xxx
Welcome back and what a cliffhanger…..!! I’m crying into my slow cooker and its not even half 8…..! X
JANE!!! So funny. How organised are you getting your dinner ready so early in the morn! I need to adopt some of these epic Mum skills x
Perfect first post back gorgeous girl and what a cliffhanger to end on! Welcome back donks – we’ve missed you tonnes!
Love this Becky, how wonderful. Sounds like a stressful final few weeks but you all handled it amazingly. Can’t wait to hear the rest!
(Especially found the waters breaking thing interesting. I had mine broken manually with my last baby and didn’t feel a thing. Now wondering if selective rose tinted memory might have altered my recollection, ha!)
Fionnula, I was wondering the same as I’m sure it didn’t hurt that much (I had it done on both labours). Think I have erased it all from my memory! xx
When I had my waters broken it didn’t hurt and after seeing the ‘hooks’ on One Born Every Minute I was dreading them having to do it…..but was fine…..!
My initial examination on the induction ward was toe curling though and the Midwife, who was so lovely, apologized saying ‘sorry, that was a bit brutal…..’ ?
That was putting it mildly……!!!
Having nothing to compare it to I can only assume that the pain came from her dilating me further… so essentially stretching my cervix? She basically pulled Tayo down into my pelvis?! So it must’ve been that right? Jeez, Louise. It definitely hurt whatever it was she did ?
Yeah I was going to say that but I was going to use the word ‘poking’ ? so didn’t bother….!
That ‘poking’ was bloody awful though and it makes me feel a bit queasy thinking about it…..!
Ouch, that does sound painful! Definitely agree that some examinations were dreadfully toe curling. Some of those midwives had fingers like sausages I’m sure!
And I’m not the only one to do the ‘backwards shuffle’ up the bed whilst being examined, right?
??
Haha!!! Backwards shuffle! Definitely remember that…!
And excellent post Becky, welcome back!! Very much on tenterhooks waiting for part 2! x
I felt the baby back up whilst the midwife did some sort of examination during my induction!
I’m not sure about a shuffle, I practically shot off the other end of the bed haha!!
Welcome back Becky. I’m really looking forward to reading the next part of your story especially after that cliffhanger.
Hi Sarah! You’ll need a cuppa ready for part two! Haha x
Welcome back Becky!
Great to have you back and read your story you have us all hooked!
Thanks Carly x
Becky this is awesome and the best thing is- is that due to your brilliant instagram stories I can hear your voice when i read it 😉 I was also induced (both times in fact) and had my waters broken (for baby number 2) with the knitting needle. (Also lots of poking – it must have taken a couple of minutes!!) I swear i’m so proud of myself just for getting through that!!! xx
Oh Rachie that’s cracked me up! We are so flippin awesome ??
My waters broke at 32 weeks and I too was admitted to hospital for 2 weeks. My little one was lying transverse too but I had to have a c-section in the end. I was so devistated to be stuck in hospital listening to everyone around me go into labour and me desperately trying not too. I know what you mean about watching the midwives – they do such an amazing job at looking after us
Oh Philippa, I really do feel for you. I was really worried about the potential c section that was lurking over me with having to look after Leo too. Well done for getting through it! We’re made of string stuff us women. Lots of love x
Whoop whoop whoop! Welcome back!!! So good to be reading your fab posts again. Instastalking just isn’t quite the same ?
Also, that doctor who said to you it’s your body and your choice ?????????? If only they were all like that….
Honestly lucy she just made me feel so… confident. X
I’m in tears!!! I loved reading this! I was one of the lucky ladies that met Becky in hospital, and I agree the midwifes are amazing! I hope other mums read this and also leave their curtains open as you need the support of other mums while you are in hospital! I can’t wait to read the next chapter of how your amazing Tayo arrived xxx
Ah beautiful Steph! My bed mate. It was so refreshing to talk to other mums also stuck in a bed. Those open curtains are essential to keeping your sanity aren’t they! X
Totally agree with this. I was offering biscuits and hugs to the girl who was crying in the next bed to me in the middle of the night. (I was totally on a high after giving birth and couldn’t sleep!) She just needed a friendly ear i think. More women should do this! xx
Yes mate! Good to have you back. Me and Franklin can’t wait to hear what comes next. Ps I’m still the biggest biscuit eating pig there ever was. No change there. Sigh. Xxx
Haha! Never change love! X
Welcome back gorgeous. Fab first post xxx
Welcome back Becky! Great post, can’t wait for part 2. x
I haven’t read the other comments but whaaaat! You can’t leave it therfor. Part 2. Better be tomorrow!
Oh my goodness Becky, I had no idea you had such a crazy time of it! Two weeks in hospital, you are an absolute hero – I’d have gone stark raving mad. The things we do for these kids, eh!
So looking forward to Part 2 of this. Can I just say now that Tayo is absolutely BEAUTIFUL! He’s going to be a little heart breaker when he grows up!
Ah Kate thanks so much. I REALLY love him ?
Great to have you back Becky. Looking forward to part 2 (and hopefully a post on coping with a toddler and a newborn?). 🙂
The midwife broke my waters during labour with my daughter (apparently my hindwaters were still intact – who knew?) and it was the single most painful part of giving birth. Horrendously so. She tried it with her hand and I was literally screaming in agony. It also didn’t work. So then she used a knitting needle type implement instead, which I did not feel at all. I really hope she had a good reason for not using that straight off the bat. Next time, if they even so much as mention breaking of waters, I’ll be asking for the knitting needle! x
Tracy I have a MASSIVE list of posts to write and that one is definitely on there.
Gosh that sounds so horrid?! Glad I wasn’t the only one who screamed x
Lovely post, thank you for sharing.
The bit about the Doctor’s make-up tickled me; I had a fairly awful labour first time around and was being wheeled into theatre just as a friend of mine was being wheeled out, having had an emergency c-sec. I remember seeing her and yelling ‘Your mascara looks amazing!!’ as we rolled past each other. I think I also acknowledged the tiny life in her arms, but she DID look incredible!
Hahahahahahahahaha Cat this made me laugh actually out loud at my desk! Priorities!!
Welcome back Becky, great post! Love what you say about having time to observe the wonderful midwives and how hard they work, I don’t know how they do it. Can’t wait to read part 2! I also had my waters broken during induction and the midwife showed me the crochet hook type implement she was about to use but I was already in a lot of pain so can’t say I remember it being too bad. Your boys are gorgeous xx
Welcome back Becky, and WHAT A CLIFFHANGER?!?! Nicely done! Can’t wait for part 2! Xxx
As everyone else said…. Argh, where’s part 2?!? Lovely read. Welcome back Becky ? X
Wow that is really suspenseful, I can’t wait for part two! Almost feels like being there with you. Which might be enhanced by me being at work and waiting for yet another baby to arrive 🙂